This letter includes a dialogue I created as a way to address an inquiry a friend & reader had about "What does it means to surrender". It also includes the greater topics of Surrendering and Intuition.
Friend: What does it mean to surrender?
Regina: For me, surrendering means giving all of myself over to my truest and wisest self; some call it the higher self or innermost self while others call it “following the heart”.
Friend: But what am I really surrendering to? What is this higher self?
Regina: The higher self is the internal aspect of a person’s divinity that is connected with the cosmic universal divine source. It is where truth, wisdom, and knowing reside.
F: How do I know that I’m actually surrendering to my higher self, and not something else like passion or expectations.
R: This is the path. The way the higher self communicates with us is by intuition. Let me give you an example:
When I received guidance in 2014 that I was to create an event for spiritual women leaders from the Boulder area, I didn’t know where to begin. At least my mind didn’t know where to begin because I had never created such an event. I sat in meditation and asked: "What is my next best step in creating this event?" By asking this question, I began the process of surrendering because I became humble; essentially saying “I need help.”
Upon beginning the spiritual path, the answers often don’t come immediately because the mind and the ego are very much in control of the human experience. By letting go of the timing of when I will receive the answer, and letting go of the expectations about how something will occur, I move into a deeper relationship with my higher self; essentially saying, “I give my chaotic mind and actions over to you.”
In this story, I waited for a week, and felt the pull of the desired date for the event moving closer. Feeling anxious, I asked again for the next best step in creating the event. The answer came in the form of a subtle inner voice. The guidance was for me to create a Meetup group. I immediately resisted this idea, thinking that I’d never done such a thing, and I didn’t see how the group was going to help with the event.
Resistance is a part of surrender.
Often, when we receive true guidance from our higher self, we don’t like the answer. That’s one way we know it’s true guidance. Because very often the mind resists the heart’s (the higher self’s) ability to speak — it thinks it knows better than divine wisdom. Passion, on the other hand, is less subtle and driven by desires rather than true knowing.
A few days later, I asked for guidance again because I didn’t take the step of creating the Meetup group due to my resistance. This time the Meetup logo flashed in front of my mind’s eye. I acquiesced, and created the group because my intuition gave me the same information in a different from — through my inner vision. I knew I needed to take action.
F: What is intuition? And more to the point, how do I follow it?
R: Intuition is the subtle inner voice of the higher self that arrives in many forms. Through the inner voice, visions, feeling sensations in the body such as goosebumps, and also as signs arriving at opportune moments symbolizing certain metaphors such as: a dream about skating on ice, or a license plate on a car, or an arrangement of numbers on a clock, or a crow cawing atop a trashcan near your house, or more specifically, a conversation you overhear on your way to lunch where a word is spoken that happens to be the answer you’ve been searching to receive.
By surrendering to the higher self, communication through intuition is enhanced. The practice is simple, yet takes years to cultivate. Discernment is necessary when engaging the higher self in order to filter out the true voice, accurate signs, and divine forms from the mind’s maze of tricks. Following the thread of intuition is very rewarding, and through practice much can be achieved in life.
For a simple practice on Cultivating Intuition, click here.
Friend: That’s all well in good, but I’m not patient (sometimes).
Regina: This is where surrendering is a courageous act. Because working through the resistance of the mind and ego in order to follow the heart, is courageous! And, if you’re not resisting, then you may not be receiving information from your higher self, unless you are already an Adept at this practice. When resistance arises, simply notice it with non-judgement, and continue your practice of going into silence.
Friend: Are their actions to take besides going into silence?
Regina: You can continue taking actions toward a desired result; however, those actions tend to be less fulfilling because they come from the mind and the ego. And when actions are made only from the mind and ego, energy can become exhausted, depleted, and wasted. But when actions occur from the sacred union of intuition and the mind, then they are made with focused intent on the exact action that is most fulfilling toward the goal or intention. It takes time to cultivate a relationship with the higher self and to follow intuition. Therefore, continue taking actions while also sitting in silence to practice listening. Then notice the difference of acting from solely the mind vs. acting from your intuitive guidance.
From silence, Knowing arises like a whale breaching from ocean's depths.
F: Hmm . . . and what if I have a timeline I’m working with to achieve a certain result?
R: That’s when surrendering is the most difficult because being patient with a mind that has an agenda is excruciatingly anxiety provoking! Continue your intuitive practice as often as possible while also letting go of expectations, results, and how “your” plan is supposed to show up. Because the mind’s best laid plans are often the most wasteful, and the intuition’s best laid plans are the most fulfilling — it’s worth waiting for the action step that arises from the depths of the truest self. The goal is to have the mind be under the control of the intuition. Once that occurs, then actions come with grace and ease. Because then, trusting guidance from the higher self is more fluent; therefore the mind follows easily.
F: Is intuition always accurate?
R: As an answer to your question, I will wrap up my story about the Meetup group. I never really knew whether creating the group assisted with the event or not. But it gave me another opportunity to practice asking for help from my higher self, surrendering through waiting and listening. In this way, yes intuition is always accurate — if you are truly following intuition, and not something else. Through the process of Cultivating Intuition, you learn how your unique higher self communicates with you in its own way.
Listening is key! To develop a relationship with the higher self, you must be able to listen to the myriad of ways that divine wisdom speaks in its subtle forms. I invite you to continue the practice of surrendering by taking the first step of asking for help. From there, the divine universe leaps in joy, and gives your truest self everything that is for its highest good — beyond your wildest dreams! Patience and practice.
The outside reflects the inside; upon finding your center, allow silence to fill you until the next step is crystal clear.
Blessings to you on your spiritual path,